CRAPPYNESS

it’s amazing how someone you know so little about can have such a big impact on you. i’ve felt crappy numerous times before, but it was never because of a guy that i fancy. the thing is, i barely know him. i’m sure once I get to know him better, i would be able to find something that is fundamentally wrong that would repel me from fancying him anymore. but for me to stop fancying him, it is necessary for me to know him better. and i can’t do that now because i can’t even get in touch with him! his mobile is constantly out of coverage and he is never online on YM… is he avoiding me? why is he avoiding me? CRAP.

usually when you’re online with someone for the first time, you can somehow gauge whether he would be interested in keeping in touch with your after you had your first chat. basically boleh tau la whether the response was good or not. and in my case, i thought the response was excellent (i actually saved the YM text from my chat with him… and sooo tempted to post it here). and then THIS happens. itu yang tak paham tu.. it aggravates me when i am not able to comprehend what is going on… why is he doing this to me? why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why? CRAP.