EVENTFUL, TO SAY THE LEAST (PART DEUX)

NOTE: reader discretion is advised :P

in the end, i decided to let go of his hand and catch up with sizzling mee. ironically i was more worried about not being able to find him in the large crowd then not knowing what couldhave happened if i followed the guy. the place was so noisy that he might not hear his phone ring if i try to contact him. once we were upstairs, i told sizz what happened. "hah! mana mana mana?" he replied in his usual ptichy-when-excited voice (wakakaka...sorry sizz). " ada kat bawah tadi... apa aku nak buat ha?" "gi la berkenalan... sembang2" hmm... betul gak kan? i mean... not everyone is looking for just action right? maybe he was looking for someone to share his views on the current situation in iraq. ok la - maybe not. but maybe he just wanted to talk.

so i told myself "if i see this guy again when i go down, i'm just gonna talk to him". and as fate would have it (wah... fate la habis) i did bump into him once again. he took my hand once again and this time i obliged. he took me upstairs (again!) and we sat at one of those sofas on the mezzanine floor (i'm assuming that everyone who reads the blog knows the layout of the club :P) we sat for a while and started talking - but only for a while though. after exchanging a few words, he got up and took my hand again. and i (again) followed him. we ended up in the ladies' toilet (which was of course, empty). we went into one of the stalls and he locked the door. we started kissing. great kisser, that guy. from kissing, he started unzipping his pants. and then he whispered "blow me". alamak, this is not safe isn't it? i can get aids from this right? - my UNBELIEVABLY oblivious mind wondered (i know, i'm practically an infant when it comes to these things). not being prepared for something like that, i politely declined. need to be perfectly clear of the health implications of the activity first. and plus, if i am gonna blow someone for the first time, it won't be some random guy i met at the club. and it definitely won't be in the female toilet of some plu club. a little bit too "adventurous" for me la. i'm more of the old-fashioned kind a guy...heheh.

after i said no, the just smiled, buttoned his jeans, kissed me once again and left. i waited for a few more seconds wondering "what did i do what did i do what did i do?!!" (that's the testosterone talking i guess) and left the toilet after that. went back down and found sizz. spilled everything. "omg omg omg! ko amik nombor dia tak?" "err... tak" didn't think that he would have given it even if i asked him for it. what's the use right? anyway, no regrets. even if there was a slight feelinig of regret, it was adequately compensated by the feeling of flattery... heheh. it could have been the bad lighting in the club, but to get someone to tarik your tangan in the club is very flattering (to me at least. other people may get their hand tugged 5 times in one night..i don't know). so, in order not to spoil the sweet memory (:P) of that night in la q*een, i guess i won't be there for quite some time. i'm afraid that the next time i go and no one tarik my tangan, i'd be utterly disappointed.

i also took the opportunity 0f being back to open up to two of my close friends who are fellow plus as well. previously, we were very silent about out sexuality although i guess each one of us were playing the guessing game with each other. however, i decided to make the bold step and open up to them. i have enough trouble playing straight in front my straight friends, why should i waste my energy to play straight with them? (it takes a lot of effort to play straight ok?). so i opened up to them. and i was glad that i did it. now i felt that there is a new level of friendship between myself and them. we all talked about this part of us that we were not willing to share previously. and all of us did not have to control macho so much in front of each other anymore. but i did ask them whether they could tell that i was a gayah before. one of them replied with a resounding "of course!". i aked him why and he replied "hello...kalau dah furniture semua beli kat ikea, hias2 bilik bagai... pas tu bila karaoke nyanyi lagu haz*mi, re* semua..apa maknanya tu?" cess... well i guess it takes one to know one la kan. tu tak leh tolong dah..

i'm going back to d*bai in about 15 hours. as expected, i dread going back there. i know that i wrote earlier if i can't find love (wah!) during my break, i'm not gonna bother anymore. i was going to delete all my online profiles. my three week break ends today, and i'm still without love. but i don't know if i can do what i plan to do. can i live the next 10 months without meeting new people on the net? although doing this has so fargiven me only heartaches and devastation, it has provided me with some hope, happiness andexcitement (albeit short-lived). i dunno... we'll see.

time to go back to crappy d*bai... sigh...