Wednesday, February 21, 2007


the big boss has just left on a one week trip this morning. i entered the office singing "freedoooommmm...freedooommmm!!!" at the top of my lungs with a gleeful smile (ok la, maybe not - but i WAS smiling). wore a plu-ish purple shirt with a matching (ALWAYS matching) dark purple-light purple-white-dark grey-light grey-peach-striped tie to celebrate the occasion. sizzling mee (who is on vacation in dubai), upon seeing me in my brights-up-the-whole-room office attire (groggily) commented "eii.. geboy sangatkan ko punya dressing hari ni?". eleh, jeles la tu. mentang2 kat office dia takde siapa pakai tie. kakakakak...

since formally declining the job offer back in malaysia (which, i think, went quite well), i've felt a little bit more calm.. it was very hard to let go of the option that i had, but now that i've eliminated the option, i can finally focus on what coming in front of me. another year in dubai. and i'm determined to make better than the last year. as much as i love myself and pride myself in the way i've charted my life so far, i have to admit there is always room for improvement :P

so this year, i will try and be happy. i will smile whenever i get reprimanded by my boss (which, thank goodness, is not a regular occurrence so far). i will just laugh (not out loud la) whenever my boss contradicts himself (THIS is almost a daily affair). i will try to be more positive in just about everything (which will be quite a challenging task given how naturally cynical i am). i will not focus on 31 january 2008 so much (which supposedly is my last day here). instead, i will try and make the most of my stay here. with all the cute ar*b guys around me, it's time that i do some serious "fishing". ikan jenis ni tak byk kat msia tu... hahahaha (as you know, the last part is just fictional). seriously, i think i will be happier if i don't think so much about the fact that i am single and without a partner (and desperately trying to do something about it). so, this year, i'm just going to take it easy. like what my favourite singer of all time (NOT!) once said, "cinta datanggggggggg..... tanpa diundang......." so if it comes, it comes. if it doesn't come.. i'll just go hunt for it next year in kl..heheheh.

there's a lot of things that i'm looking forward to in the next few weeks.friends coming over for visits, moving into my new apartment,going back to malaysia for a longer break. nice, pleasant things to look forward too, especially the moving into the new apartment bit. being a true-blue plu, interior decoration is one of my interests. and i love having these small little projects for myself. it makes me excited .. like a little boy in a candy store. and because of that, i've been going the home decor section of departmental stores, ikea-equivalents and the souqs here scouring for things for my new apartment - alone, nonetheless (with the exception of these past few days because mr sizzlingmee is around). but still i'm enjoying myself. who knows, maybe later i'll post some photos in a later entry for a while (which WILL be comment-disabled.. it's bad to kill a man's dream - and i don't want anyone to do that to me :P)

ok, gotta go. ikea calling. eheh..

Thursday, February 15, 2007


living in this country requires you to adapt. adapt to eating your pizza, burgers and fries WITHOUT the good old chilli sauce. adapt to having to settle for very greasy fried chicken in kfc. adapt to paying exorbitant prices for things which are so cheap back home. but on top of everything it requires you to adapt to the type of english that the country is using.

after staying here for a year, i have to say that i'm quite proud of my ability to adapt to the uae brand of english. i have friends from m*laysia who were impressed with the way i communicate with the taxi drivers and the shop assistants here. how i intentionally deteriorate my spoken english to make it comprehensible by the other party. i can even do their accent now :P

so, to those of you who plan to visit this country anytime soon (or planning to get a job here), let me give you a headstart on how to speak english - the emirates way. may i now present to you the first lesson of ...

"how to make people understand you in this country when you speak english"


PART I - placing your order over the phone.

cafe: allu
you: hello, shahiq cafeteria?
*shahiq cafeteria, is, btw my favourite cafe here. they even know my name there :P
cafe: ayowa (this apparently means yes)- shahiq cafeteria
you: send me one chicken beriyani ok? a lot spicy aa? (being malaysian, i assume that you guys would want to order everything as "extra spicy" here)
cafe: wokkey. send wherr?
you: (name your location here). what time coming?
cafe: 20 minutes coming.
you: ok bye.

PART II - following up on your delivery (if you are not a regular, chances are you will have to do this)
you: hello, shahiq cafeteria?
cafe: ayowa
you: my friend (that's what everyone calls everyone here), where is chicken beriyani? (name your location here). very late coming.
cafe: ok.. coming coming. 5 minutes aaa...
you: come now ok? i am too much hungry.
afe: wokkey wokkey

TIP: don't ever try to go all queen's english and construct proper sentences like "i would like to place an order" or "how long do you think it will take for the delivery to arrive?". chances are, they will misunderstand you. keep it simple, and throw everything thaat you have learned back in grammar school out the window. stick to keywords. and you'll be fine :)

coming up in lesson two : flirting with ar*b guys

yeah, RIGHT - like i know how to do that :P

Tuesday, February 13, 2007


those of you who know me personally will know that i've been struggling with a tough decision this past month. you see, i have received a job offer from a company back home. it was a company which i have always been interested in joining. not because of the remuneration, but because of what the company does. and also what i can do potentially in my position to help what the company does. it feels like with this job, i can finally use my skills and knowledge to contribute to the society. to my ummah. it was more like a dream JOB to me.

but, ironically (my life is full of ironies) this is also the time when my evil boss here decided to give me a big fat increment. it was like a dream SALARY to me :P. so needless to say, i was torn.

i have not been happy staying here. in the past year, there were times when i was feeling so down that i hit a new low. lack of friends, housemate from hell, sucky boss, a few online 'relationships' which gone bad - nottttt a pretty year for me. but from the outside, everyone thinks that it has been a great year. good salary, working overseas, losing weight. i was determined to go back after getting my bonus. so that's why i set on looking for a job. and lucky for me (OR unlucky for me), i landed on my dream job.

hence, the big, jumbo-sized dilemma. almost everyone i know told me that i should stay. this opportunity may not come by again (which i have to admit, is true. being a local graduate with no professional qualification, what i have know is really ..err.. "very neat"). however, being someone who has always made the "less popular" decisions thoughout his life, i didn't want to listen to what they say. i think i know myself best. and what is best for me. the best for my career. and i deserve happiness. at least i'll be happier in kl than here. so i told everyone that i was adamant about leaving. my dad was crushed. my brothers and sisters ask me to re-think about it. my friends said that i was crazy. and when i told my boss about my decision, he had me sit for 90 minutes because he couldn't believe that i made that decision (i told him a day after i got my increment).

however, slowly and slowly,due to tremendous pressure from everyone asking me to reconsider, i started to think differently. perhaps my future employer can give me another opportunity in the future. even if that fails, maybe there will be other companies in the same industry (although not many) who might want to take me in later. since i'm hoping to build up my ssavings this year, i could probably offer myself at a lower rate just for me to get into the industry. and maybe this year will not be as sucky as last year. i'm getting my own apartment this year - a cute 1 bedroom apartment just for myself. and boss will be hiring new people to replace the 3 who has left. he should have learned his lesson not to hire another "housemate". so i hope that he will find some competent, nice, cute plu to work with me (i'm kidding i'm kidding...competent and nice is good enough for me). plus, it will look more impressive on my resume if i clock two years here instead of one. and personally, i do want to stay in this country a little bit longer because i want to visit places around this region before i go back. and as long as i promise myself not to get into another virtual relationship, i should be fine - NO HEARTBREAK in 2007.. woohoo!!! :P

so, in the end, i have decided to slug it out for another year here. and i will try to love this country this year. it's been a year but i don't think i know enough about this country. so i will try to know more about the country. instead of reading m'sian online newspaper everyday, i will subscribe to the local newspaper now (that way i will know when and where the sale is going on :P). i will blog more often. i will buy a treadmill and work it! :P. and i will try to live more stress-free and stop doing things that stress me. like shaving. or ironing. or cleaning my bathroom. from now on, i'm going to outsource those services. why? because i'm worth it! hahahah...

tomorrow, i will call the company in m'sia to inform them that i am declining the offer. i relly hope that they won't be pissed at me and will still consider me in the future (if only i could bribee them with something.. heheheh *evil thought). if they are, that would be the best. i would be able to get the best of both worlds eventually. but if they are not receptive to that, i guess i'll just have to let go of this dream job of mine. why? because this is what the people around me want. because of the money. because they want me to live their dream. i mean, this is partly my dream too. but i have another dream which i think is more noble (which is the job back in m'sia), and not as materialistic as this dream. yep, truth be told, i'm not really that proud of myself right now. it feels like i have lost a battle. i just hope that god will help me find a way to redeem myself later.

one thing i'm starting to realise is that maybe it's not so good to plan everything in advance. to think so much of the future. because life can just throw something at you that will tip the balance of your decision and your plan which will eventually cause things to be more complicated and makes the decision making process harder. just like what happens to me. if i wasn't such a planner, i wouldn't have gotten my friend to get me an interview when i was back home for just a week last hari raya haji. and wouldn't have prepared so well for it that i nailed it. and i wouldn't have gotten the offer which is now really the cause of my big headache. if there was no offer, there was really no decision to be made. i would have just stayed on for another year. but nooooooooo .... i just HAD to plan *grunts*

anyway, i appreciate you guys leaving your comments if you wish to do so (i do need all the kata2 perangsang that i could get :P), but if your comment is about how my decision is the wrong decision and how i should follow my dream and not others, please refrain from doing so. it's not that because i don't want to listen to your opinion, but because it would be too late. and believe me, i've been thinking about this for soooo long and sooooo hard. it feels like i have thought about everything there IS to be thought about in this matter. sampai demam2 (i'm not kidding). i'm just so bloody tired to think about this anymore. i'm just going into my second year in this country head on.

bring it on !!!!

Saturday, February 03, 2007


for some reason, reading malaysian online newspaper has been a depressing affair this past few days. and i'm not even reading about the crime cases (which by the way has gotten more gory by the day). why has it gotten more depressing? because i am beginning to realise that our country is being run by (to put it mildly) not so intelligent beings (feeling2 takut kena
tangkap ISA ni... heheh)

first it was the news about the toll agreement which got leaked out, then it was the uninspiring speech by our premier. and today - the controversy about some chief minister not
approving the application for building a chinese masjid. reading that news just made me flipped!
really, how stupid are our politicians? do they need to go through and iq test and get AT MOST an 85 to qualify as a minister? because that's how it looks like at the moment. not
approving the chinese mosque because it would segregate muslims? (big fat) HALLLLOOOOOOOO! if the arabs think the same way as you do, mr minister - they would not have allowed the quran to be translated to our language. they would not have allowed US to conduct the khutbah sembahyang jumaat in bahasa melayu for god's sake (pun intended). bodoh ke hapa? ingat islam melayu punya ke? segregate the muslims my a**. tu la... makan lagi duit rasuah bebanyak..kan dah jadi dungu.

how do we expect the government to run efficiently if so much time is wasted talking about issues which are not supposed to be issues in the first place? (you're right, we don't).
what is this guy so worried about anyway? that his ego will be bruised because the chinese converts would be more knowledgeable in islam than him? from his statement, actually
based on his statement, it doesn't take a lot to be more knowledgeable than him. even a definitely-not-very-religious guy like me can safely claim that i'm more knowledgeable than
him. (and i'm a plu pulak tu). ke saja nak flex his muscles?

dah la the chinese association are not even asking for money to build the masjid (which i feel they should be entitled for btw - because it's under Jabatan Kemajuan Islam Malaysia, NOT Jabatan Kemajuan MELAYU Islam Malaysia), nak mintak approval bina masjid pun tak bagi? nak kena panah petir ke?

is aiskrempotong-ism turning into a political blog? nah.. don't worry. i will still continue to write about my pathetic life as a not-so-hunky malay plu (since people seem to
enjoy that. seriously, sometimes i feel like people read my blog just to feel better about themselves. i'm imagining people after reading my blog feel grateful that at least there
is someone else in this world who is more pathetic than them. and once in a while, when they feel the need to reaffirm that fact, they'll drop by my blog and they'll chant to
themselves thank god my life is not that pathetic" over and over again, and then get on with the life with that affirmation. well, glad to be of service guys!! ;P

Thursday, February 01, 2007


one of the things that i keep hearing whenever i voice my desire to go back to m'sia would be "janganla balik... malaysian economy not very good at the moment. p*k lah not doing a very good job". although there could be some truth in that statement, i don't feel that the economy is THAT bad that i won't be able to get a job. i mean - hello, it's ME we are talking about here (ya allah, takabbur nya.... hahaha. i was just kidding ok?). and whoever it is that runs the country would not have a direct impact on my employment opportunities back home right. but after reading this, i got worried.

fyi, i've never been a big fan of politics. it's filthy, and you can never know what the truth is because all the channels which provide the information to us (the tv, the political blogs) would have some vested interest in one of the groups. how do i know what is right and what is wrong then? and for someone who is very susceptible to being lied to, politics is (and never will be) my cup of tea.

but i only came to this realisation as i grew older. when i was younger , i used to watch those live telecasts of the perhimpunan agung (remeber those non-astro days when all live telecasts could only mean that the show is great and thus should not be missed?) . it was quite exciting to watch them announce the members of the majlis tertinggi. i remember there was one time when p*k lah was a candidate for the majlis tertinggi. and i remember rooting for him (just for fun) because he looks like a very nice guy. you have to agree with me, among the one-look-and-you-know-they-are-not-very-nice-people politicians in our country, he does stand out quite a bit with his fatherly, innocent appearance right? but of course, it takes more than having fatherly, innocent look to run the country. a certain amount of intelligence is required. we are talking about malaysia here ok? a land where geniuses (like me and you - the reader :P) are born. we need a leader who can LEAD and guide us to greater heights. NOT to tell us to keep our buildings clean!

i don't know about you guys, but i was angered when i read the article! i mean, with all due respect mr prime minister, you are running a country here - not a kindergarten! do you NOT have anything better to tell your fellow countrymen than to ask them to keep the buildings clean?!! even if you feel the need to reiterate that to your fellow rakyat, shouldn't that be left to the city council mayor or something? just take a look at some of the redundant, non-value adding statements made:

The Prime Minister said no doubt Malaysia had many beautiful buildings, “but we need them to be clean and attractive so that people will enjoy looking at them.”

Abdullah said there were many housing estates and villages in the Federal Territories and advised the councils to ensure that these too were kept clean and pretty.

“People are an important element. Without dynamic people, cities become soul-less.
(and without a dynamic prime minister, the country will penni-less sir)

am i the only one disturbed by the unsophisticated way of thinking demonstrated by our leader? no right? RIGHT? (getting all flustered and sweaty for no apparent reason)